Through the stress of my recent weeks I have been questioning myself a lot (reoccurring theme here), what do I want from life? From work? What is my passion? What will make me happy? The honest answer is I don’t have a freaking clue! I feel as though sometimes I think things are my passion and make me happy and then I’m looking for something else.
I wanted a new job because I had been in my old position nearly three years. I wanted a promotion, not only want, needed, I felt like I deserved it. I got it after a few tries. Now I feel like I sit here moaning about it. It’s hard. I’m trying to do well and make a good job of it. Sometimes I think maybe I’m just not good enough.
I wanted to prove I could be a young independent woman. I’ve always stood on my own two feet. I’ve always had my own money and goals. I’ve never relied on a guy. Now I’ve got my own place, a good job and I’m bored of being single, I’d like a guy. Its been well over a year! What’s wrong with me?
I wanted to travel the world and be completely carefree. Experience things I have never before. See different cultures and countries. Not worry about the time I wake up or what I have to do. Now I have a mortgage. What’s stopping me?
It’s easy to have passions. What is not easy is to follow them. I want to have passions but I don’t want to feel regret for not fulfilling them. Maybe I am getting confused by my own dreams, passion and goals. Sometimes though they all mix into one. Why do i doubt myself and what is possible?