My Inner Child

So I haven’t written as regularly as I wanted to recently due to plain old life getting in the way of my creativity and being down right knackered! I saw the following meme on Facebook and when I read today’s prompt word I knew I had to put the two together!

meme

I do understand I am a fully fledged grown up with responsibilities. I do understand I need a job to pay for those responsibilities. I do understand life is not easy and we all go through stress, pain and hard times. I do understand people have much bigger problems than me.

However. As childish as this may be. I don’t want to be a grown up anymore. I want to tantrum, strop and throw myself on the floor screaming. I want to say a big “fuck you” to life as an adult, while pointing my middle finger at no-one in particular while sticking my tongue out.

I am seriously resisting an urge to just give up.

Wouldn’t it be amazing to just press snooze on my alarm and stay in bed? Not get up and go to work where I constantly leave with brain ache. Or  wouldn’t it be amazing to swan off round the world and visit all the amazing places and beaches? Or to turn the clock back to when I had no worries, responsibilities or REAL problems? When decisions were made for you, money was managed for you and when your parents literally were the worst things you had to deal with. You realise it wasn’t so bad being a kid when your an adult and dealing with the stresses they went through on a daily basis.

I think I have it pretty easy considering I only have myself to look after and no children or real responsibility.

The urge is there, bubbling under my skin, screaming to get out.  The resist to give up being a “proper” adult and give in to my inner child voice to stop being responsible and boring is REAL.

via Daily Prompt: Resist

11 thoughts on “My Inner Child”

  2. The Writer's Block says:
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    I have this feeling about once a week. Usually because I’m missing my mom and dad, both passed away three years ago, a few months apart. I miss them because without them here, I feel i can no longer properly regress and be someone’s child again. I feel trapped, taken hostage by the world as an adult with no alternative to be anything but. The struggle to not adult is real, and sometimes, so are my tears. Real big ugly crying happens enough for me to just call it a day a few times a month and then I put my big girl panties on and get down to the business of cleaning the litter boxes. Again. Of doing the dishes. Again. Of going to work. Again.

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    • Kashia says:
      Reply

      I am sorry to hear about your parents. I’m having this feeling nearly everyday at the moment. I’m hoping its phase that will pass or at least not come as regularly.

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      • The Writer's Block says:

        Thank you. They were my only connection to anyone else like myself except for one aunt who I don’t see often. I hope this passes for you too. Would some artificial sun help? A light lamp to help brighten your spirits? Right now for me I’m just going through the motions but able to have some bright spots which helps.

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